Thursday, February 10, 2011

Day 73 - No, Fuck YOU, Stanley Tucci

Day 73.

Stanley Tucci, as we all know, plays Julia's flawless, not-a-homosexual, super supportive husband, Paul, in Julie & Julia. The man can really do no wrong. He's smart, he's talented, he's politically conscious, he's not a homosexual--what more could you possibly ask for in a man?

Well, for starters, how about someone who isn't giving me the finger right now? Yeah, that's right, Tucci--I've been onto you for awhile now. There's no way out of this one. You've been caught in the fucking act, sir. The passive-aggressive "Oh, look at me, I'm the best husband ever, but I'm just going to flip you the bird when you're not looking" bit doesn't fool me for a second.

Flip me off with that gaudy ring, why don't cha? Fucking dickweed.

That is an incredibly vulgar and offensive gesture, Mr. Tucci. And this whole time, I thought Julie & Julia was just another inoffensive culinary feel-good film. And don't give me that "I was just tasting my wife's frosting" excuse. I'm pretty sure that the index finger (colloquially known as the "pointer") is the officially designated appendage for all matters regarding the act of "tasting," including but not limited to chocolate frosting. So you clearly had to go out of your way to deliberately flip off the entire audience. And though everyone else may think you're the bee's pajamas and the cat's knees, you won't be pulling any wool over my eyes today. I see you for who you truly are. In short...

Fuck YOU, Stanley Tucci.


Julie & Julia
Quote of the Day: "Fuck them."

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